Hey lovely ladies ❤
August has been an interesting month for me. We are yet again in another lockdown – lockdown 6.0 and my heart goes out to those who are struggling mentally, financially and emotionally.
This month started for me on a weary note. In my journal, reading my notes, I was tired for a few days on end. As I was processing my thoughts, I realised the tiredness was partly from the previous month and having had a new schedule for my workday and training a new VA. My body was processing all the stress from the previous month (you can read my blog here). A lot of times when we face harsh situations, we tend to keep moving through it because sometimes that’s what we need to do. Especially, if you have family, you need to get through the days.
The perfect example of this was when my husband cut his thumb (like literally sliced a part of it) while chopping veggies and I had to move quickly that day to help him out, even though blood makes me nauseous!
But it is so important to process it at some time, otherwise, the emotions get stuck in your body and appear as illness. When you don’t address it for prolonged times, it can even result in serious illnesses.
Journaling has now become my favourite way of finding solutions to my problems. I can really get into the issue and dump everything on my mind without having to whinge to anyone else (or sometimes when you can’t or don’t want to share).
One thing I noticed from my scribbling is that I felt social pressure to keep ‘doing’ and ‘achieving’ success. Now, of course, no one, in particular, told me to do stuff as I’m not working with a coach right now. Analysis, tells me that being on social media made me put pressure on myself! How bad is that?
When I asked why I am so hard on myself, I realised that my intrinsic desire to be good naturally pushes me, but still, the inner critic scolds me when I make any mistake or when I’ve scheduled a task but couldn’t get to it because hey, it’s still lockdown, my children are home schooling, I’m training a new VA plus running my business, taking care of my health (fill in with what you are doing in your life). Then why do I let the inner critic take over and make me feel bad and make me feel as though I’m not enough?
When I live in my mind, that’s when the inner critic pops its head. My inner critic is when I compare myself and my actions with those of some others who I feel are doing really well – mostly in business. I had to constantly remind myself that this is my life, it’s ok to live the way I really want to and that constantly trying to live someone else’s version is not going to help me. When I live in presence, there is no inner critic.
I often think that I should get a business coach to help me scale faster. But at what cost? I’ve had a business coach before and I felt like I was trying to catch up with business, with life, with family and finally decided that I need to trust my innate wisdom to guide me. I have mentors and coaches and others I call upon when I need them, but I learnt that I need to trust my decisions too!
That voice that criticises you is not yours, it is an adapted voice. You go to the gym 5 days a week and then don’t see much difference. But then this person who doesn’t do much is naturally slim, your inner critic rears its ugly head. This month, I tried to pay attention to this voice and give myself permission to love myself more.
I juggled between this and gratitude and the last two weeks have been fulfilling personally and work-wise.
My top two lessons from August
#1: Don’t be a harsh critic of myself
#2: Introspect to find peace with life as it happens
I would love to hear from you, if this resonates with you or if you would love to share anything with me.