You have a wonderful partner, beautiful children, a secure job but there is still something you are not happy about. Sometimes, even when we have everything we still feel if something changed, we can be much happier. This is not about comparing yourself to others and then wanting to change, this is more about having all the basic necessities and still not happy.
If you feel that way, you need to look at what you want to change in your life. When you have everything and you are still not happy, it typically implies dissatisfaction. Sometimes, it could be a long term exhausting dissatisfaction. Or it could be something that you put under the rug (possibly quite often) and now it needs cleaning up. Doing this kind of stuff is the difference between living a mediocre vs happy, contented life.
You’re going to look at what needs to change without laying guilt or judgement on yourself (or any one). Just observing and not criticizing.
Find a quiet time and space to do this.
Note: Don’t concern yourself with your adult-self i.e. try not to be concerned with being responsible and over all, don’t hold yourself back. With regards to what you want to change, it can include a list of personal, professional and world issues. Whatever bothers you a lot or little.
Take a piece of paper or your journal and answer the questions below in any order:
- What have you whinged about on more than three occasions?
- In your life, what is weighing you down, that feels burdensome?
- What are you tired of feeling, and what makes you feel that way?
- What would you love to ‘never do’ again?
- What do you fantasise about leaving or changing?
Don’t rush into completing this exercise just for the sake of doing it. You can even find a different environment, like a quiet café to do this – so you won’t be distracted or disturbed.
There is no Step 2 to “do”. Once you’ve taken time to answer the questions above, be with the discomfort, the feeling, the frustration (sometimes frustration can be a good thing).
We’re not rushing with a quick process on how to fast fix and change whatever is bothering you, because that kind of quick fix doesn’t last long. More important is for you to feel the power of your declaration. May be it is the first time you are even doing this kind of exercise to understand what bothers you – the first time you have articulated ‘what’ and ‘why’ certain things need to change. So, hang out with the idea and let the cells in your body get the message.
Until you are ready to let it go, it is hard to make the change. Now that you’ve written down things on paper, see how strong the ‘I don’t like it’ feeling gets, over the next few days.
Instead of pushing yourself with shame, criticism and hatred, motivate yourself with love and praise.
Whenever your body and mind is ready to let it go, it is time to have a good bye conversation with it. Write a letter…
I have made the decision to let you go. Thank you for teaching me a few things.
I don’t have answers on how to fix this, but I am opening up myself – ready to let you go. The Universe will show me answers and ways to let it go and make the change.
I am ready for the transformation.
You can write as many letters as you want, when the time is ready for you to let go and to change whatever you desire. Because with this kind of clarity, attracting what you want in your life becomes an easy process. Enjoy the journey called life; because I believe that the happiest people in life are the ones who adapt and learn to make changes that keep them happy.